Friday 1 April 2011

My Wrestle Mania Card - By Captain Obvious

As we sit here a few days away from Wrestlemania 27, I look over the card and wonder what could have been. This year's card doesn't really stand out in any way to me. No match on the card is a must see event in my mind. Most of the matches are semi main events or matches we have already seen before. This is the most disappointing Wrestlemania on paper in the last 5 years at least. So this little rant here is how I would book Wrestlemania 27 this year.

Match 1
Beth Phoenix and Trish Stratus vs. Lay-Cool

If your going to have divas on the card, how can you not have the best wrestler in the division on the card. Beth is the best wrestler in the diva division, yet this year she is on the sidelines. Instead we have Snookie wrestling. Come on guys, we can have Snookie wrestle on raw or guest host but to have her actually wrestle on the biggest card of the year is ridiculous. I think it would be great to have the diva of the past team up with the diva of the present to take on the top two heel divas in what would be a great diva tag match. This would also allow WWE to debut Awesome Kong as an ally of Lay-Cool and take out Beth and Trish, giving Kong instant credibility among the eyes of the WWE Universe.

Match 2
Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus..... Fatal 4 Way for the US title.

You could almost call this the futures match of the WWE. Just like at the NBA All Star Game or the Major League Baseball All Star Game, this match would showcase 4 of the younger stars of the WWE that could be destined for Superstardom. Sheamus has the ability to be the best heel on the roster of Raw. He has the size, the strength, and the mental makeup to constantly be a main event talent. Why he has gotten pushed to mid-card is a little worrisome. Daniel Bryan already is the best technical wrestler in the WWE. He has shown over the last year that is lack of size isn't a detriment to his in ring ability as he has taken on men 2 and 3 times his size so far and has managed to hold his own against all of them. Ziggler and Morrison should be main eventing a Wrestlemania in the next 5 years. These two young men have really stepped up over the last few months and have gotten the fans to take notice of this. It's almost looking into a time machine and watching a young Curt Henning battle a young Shawn Michaels. The next step in their evolution should be to work on their mic work and once they master that, they will be the stars of 2013.

Match 3
The Corre (Barrett,Gabriel, and Slater) vs. Santino, Kozlov, and Kofi

The only reason I am making this a six man tag is because we have already seen these competitors compete in recent weeks against each other anyway. But storyline wise it does make the most sense. Barret just beat Kofi and Gabriel and Slater have been feuding with SantiLov for the last couple months. The thing no one is talking about right now is how The Corre is slowly taking over Smackdown as they now hold all the gold they can carry except the World Title. This would also keep Kane from turning face again and becoming goofy Kane which WWE tends to do with any big guy face in their company when they get tired of their heel run.

Match 4
CM Punk vs Randy Orton (steel cage)

The only thing that could make this match any better is to put them inside the cage. Both men have gotten upper hands in this feud by doing hit and run attacks on each other. Ideally, this would also keep anyone else from interfering in the match giving these two young lions a chance to settle this feud the right way. This feud has been the highlight of Raw over the last few months and is the only match on the card I actually want to see. CM Punk is an amazing heel and Orton has been growing into a solid face after having a long run as the top heel in WWE for a couple years.

Match 5
Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio

The only thing that is intriguing about this match is the evolution of Cody Rhodes as we try to watch him grow into a stronger heel week by week. Cody is becoming the star most people thought Ted Dibiase was supposed to become this year. The other part of this match that is interesting is wether or not this is Rey's last match in WWE. Rumors have abounded that Rey wants out and asked to be released after Wrestlemania. If history is any indication of booking, Rey isn't going to go out on a white horse into the sunset. Just ask JBL how his last match at Wrestlemania was when they knew he was leaving. 13 seconds, if memory serves me.

Match 6

OK, I know I may be a mark, but I have grown to love having MITB at Wrestlemania. It has become a staple of the Wrestlemania diet and this year I feel like I'm hungering for it. But this year lets make it different. Instead of shoving more and more mid card guys into it who have struggle to finally get to main event status, let us have the guys who can't even seem to get a break anymore. I want to see guys like Zach Ryder, Curt Hawkins, Evan Bourne, JTG, guys who are hungry for their break and would work their ass off to make their name known to the universe. More known than just the fodder in video games most of the fans use them for when they make a more interesting character in their mind. Yeah, I'm talking to you kids out their who make a Twilight Vampire in your create a wrestler only to have them beat up Mr. WOO WOO lol.

Match 7
Triple H vs. The Undertaker vs. Kane vs. Big Show

You want to put The Undertaker's streak in real jeopardy. Have him in a fatal 4 way against 3 other men he has defeated at Wrestlemania in years past. put him in a match where he can technically lose even without getting pinned. All of these men have long histories with the Undertaker (wether WWE wants to admit it or not.....Yes, I saw Wrestlemania 17 WWE). Kane won 3 matches against Undertaker in a row before Taker went away for a while. Kane has also lost to Undertaker twice at Wrestlemania, so he has something still to probe to escape the shadow of The Undertaker. Big Show has lost to Undertaker one on one at Wrestlemania and in a handicap match at Wrestlemania. And even the King of Kings bowed to Undertaker before at Mania. This match would put the streak in more limbo than any other match could do.

Match 8
Michael Cole vs. Jerry Lawler

Ok, if we have to have this match we are going to do it under my rules. First off, I want WWE to hand deliver an apology letter to Jack Swagger and tell him they are sorry for how fast he has fallen over the last year. Win MITB, Win the World Title, Lost Title, Lose Rematch, Lose Self Respect, Get Mascot, Lose Mascot, now go train Micahel Cole......seriously, who did Jack Swagger piss off this year? That is a horrible career for a lot of wrestlers, let alone a 365 day span. So if we are going to have Swagger in Cole's corner, then put Austin in Lawler's corner. We don't need Austin in the ring as the referee. Everyone is already expecting him to stun Cole allowing Lawler to get the win, so where is the drama? Let Brian Christopher referee the match if you want drama. That would leave me a little bit in suspense at least. Then, if Lawler and Cole are in the ring, can we please have JR and Joey Styles on commentary. I would love to hear slobberknocker and OH MY GOD rammed in about 30 times just to make me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside.

Match 9
Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio for the World Title

This match has grown on me over the last few weeks. I had no desire to see this match after the Royal Rumble and I still have some doubts. But the doubts are now what is leading me to want to see the match now. Can Del Rio actually live up to the hype and promise he shows in the ring. Can he handle the stage and not only capture the World Title but do it in convincing fashion that gives him credibility in the eyes of the fans. Is it just me or is Edge the most underrated man who has held the World Title 10 times. When you think of the all-time greats, do you put Edge in your top 10, let alone top 5? This is another shot for Edge to steal the show and finally claim that coveted legendary status. In the pantheon of wrestling hierarchy, can Edge finally get mentioned in the same breath as Flair, Hogan, Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, Austin, Rock or is he going to be thought of as the WWE's version of Jeff Jarrett.

Match 10
John Cena vs. The Miz with Rock as special referee for the WWE Title

This match is compelling for a couple of reasons. WWE has learned that John Cena is not The Rock. The ratings since Rock's return have proved that. You need a face for the company to be charismatic not charming. Everyone thinks the boy next door is a nice kid, but girls love the bad boys. John Cena is not edgy, The Rock is edgy. John Cena is not captivating, The Rock is captivating. So with this in mind, let's put The Rock in the ring for this match not as a potential run in causing a crap ending. The other reason I am interested in this match is that this could be the match that saves The Miz's main event career. Right now Miz is teetering on the brink of becoming the 2012 version of Jack Swagger. His title run has not been the strongest and in many peoples eyes has actually become a complete let down. I am one of the fans of The Miz over the last 18 months and had high hopes for his reign. if Miz does not win at Wrestlemania 27, he could be feuding with JTG by next December and not in a good way.

Let me know what you guys think and what matches you would like to see. As always you can hit me up on twitter @thecaptaino or you can also check out my wrestling show that I created and broadcast for by going to and looking for the New Era Wrestling link. Peace and Love, Peace and Love and have a great Wrestlemania weekend everyone.

Captain Obvious Trey Dent

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